What's the deal with eggnog?

Where does all the eggnog in the world go on January 1? I’m just wondering, because it seems to magically disappear from every grocery store, every Costco, every Sam’s Club. It’s not even discounted anywhere because the expiration date on the remaining 47 cases of eggnog is January 2 and they are trying to unload it. I would still buy it! I would buy it and freeze it and thaw it out and celebrate Valentine’s Day with it. Yes, I would. But it’s not there. It’s not anywhere. It’s completely gone. Why?



It says on the container that it’s a holiday classic. Why does it have to be a HOLIDAY classic? Can’t it be an EVERYDAY classic? I like to have it every day, that’s for sure. Right, it’s bad for me—I know that, but I want the OPTION of having it every day, and that option is being taken away from me. Eggnog lovers, unite! Let’s demand that we at least be allowed to buy the eggnog that is still … SOMEWHERE!

I bought 6 half gallons of eggnog on December 31 at Costco, and they had LOTS. The checker asked me if it was marked down. I said, “No, but I know if I come back in two days, it will be gone!” The expiration date on these half gallons is February 9. I don’t even have to freeze them! Between my kids and me, this will be gone long before then.

So, what gives? Where has all the eggnog gone? Why is the eggnog gone? I’ll ponder this subject while I drink my own eggnog right now. I lace mine with a little brandy and liberally sprinkle it with nutmeg. Some people like rum in their eggnog. It doesn’t matter what you like in it, though, if you can’t even get it. Bah humbug!